Ranpog is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, overgenerous seal.

Ranpog created snails six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ranpog, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Ranpog, he will turn you into a snail.

Ranpog's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Ranpog's Holy Commandments

1. Never chant in the presence of elders.

2. Do not hurt mice.

3. Never approach mountains carrying clay.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Never allow cats to sleep beneath your roof.