Shavwipbop is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, generous toad.

Shavwipbop created parasitic wasps five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Shavwipbop, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Shavwipbop, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Shavwipbop's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Shavwipbop's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not prepare spinach while filled with fear.

4. Never allow voles to sleep beneath your roof.

5. Always treat moths with great respect.