Tankanjip is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, resourceful squirrel.

Tankanjip created oxygen four years ago.

If you believe in Tankanjip, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Tankanjip, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Tankanjip's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Tankanjip's Holy Commandments

1. Never prepare coconuts during summer.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never think about quantum field theory near pigs while wearing pink shirts and balancing nine silicon spheres on your head.

4. Do not fashion sacred items from bone.

5. Never leap in spring.