Tardibhomtit is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, astonishing mink.

Tardibhomtit created the planet Jupiter eight million years ago.

If you believe in Tardibhomtit, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Tardibhomtit, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Tardibhomtit's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Tardibhomtit's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Shun those given to sloth.

3. Never speak the names of nebulae aloud.

4. You must love Tardibhomtit.

5. Do not commit murder.