Davnigguttontettigepgil is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, egotistical crab.

Davnigguttontettigepgil created Asia four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Davnigguttontettigepgil, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Davnigguttontettigepgil, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Davnigguttontettigepgil's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Davnigguttontettigepgil's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak sacred words in autumn.

2. Do not contemplate dark energy during the night.

3. Never discuss nucleic acids in public assemblies.

4. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

5. Erect a giant tin sculpture of Davnigguttontettigepgil in the centre of the settlement.