Larglargnig is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, ill-tempered cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Larglargnig created energy two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Larglargnig, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Larglargnig, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Larglargnig's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Larglargnig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. You must never eat aubergines.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Never talk about gravity near mites while wearing pink skirts.

5. Never allow hamsters to witness sacred rites.