Tafloghakzog Campiggov is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, contented dugong.

Tafloghakzog Campiggov created water five million years ago.

If you believe in Tafloghakzog Campiggov, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Tafloghakzog Campiggov, it will strike you with lightening.

Tafloghakzog Campiggov's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Tafloghakzog Campiggov's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Run away if three monkeys approach from the east.

3. Never talk about dwarf planets.

4. Hide from turquoise aardvarks for they are unholy.

5. Retreat if seven mice approach from the north.