Flandaghin is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, intelligent faun.

Flandaghin created the universe nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flandaghin, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Flandaghin, it will turn you into a duck.

Flandaghin's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Flandaghin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion tools from silver.

2. Hide if seven manatees approach from the west.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Flandaghin must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never mix melons with oil.