Nibdonbadhen is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, awesome faun.

Nibdonbadhen created an up quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Nibdonbadhen, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Nibdonbadhen, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Nibdonbadhen's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Nibdonbadhen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not travel during autumn.

4. Never think about the strong nuclear force near horses while wearing gray rings and balancing six silver spheres on your feet.

5. Never paint your arms violet.