Japvedmon is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, contented jackal.

Japvedmon created carbon five million years ago.

If you believe in Japvedmon, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Japvedmon, she will destroy your home planet.

Japvedmon's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Japvedmon's Holy Commandments

1. Never point your hands toward the east during prayer.

2. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never touch water while tainted.

5. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.