Bastnibsag is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, stupid toad.

Bastnibsag created the planet Saturn nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bastnibsag, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bastnibsag, she will turn you into a goat.

Bastnibsag's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Bastnibsag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not study the inheritance of acquired characteristics on holy days.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Do not dye your hair green.

4. Tortoises are not to be trusted.

5. Do not kill ducks.