Fembigpit is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, benevolent goat.

Fembigpit created the planet Jupiter five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fembigpit, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Fembigpit, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Fembigpit's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Fembigpit's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fembigpit.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. You must pray to Fembigpit nine times a day.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Put Fembigpit first in all things.