Fablitsagpas is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, duplicitous gerbil.

Fablitsagpas created dark energy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fablitsagpas, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Fablitsagpas, he will laugh at you.

Fablitsagpas' most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Fablitsagpas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Do not keep nine badgers in a large pit.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.