Tikvignurt is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, deceitful aardvark.

Tikvignurt created the Virgo Supercluster seven million years ago.

If you believe in Tikvignurt, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Tikvignurt, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Tikvignurt's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Tikvignurt's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate gulls.

2. Never wear stockings.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Run away if three whales approach from the south.

5. Do not chop down trees.