Sigquillcat Nurmotcub is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, two-faced dugong.

Sigquillcat Nurmotcub created parasitic wasps seven million years ago.

If you believe in Sigquillcat Nurmotcub, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Sigquillcat Nurmotcub, she will turn you into a rat.

Sigquillcat Nurmotcub's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Sigquillcat Nurmotcub's Holy Commandments

1. Never allow pigs to witness sacred rites.

2. Erect a large gold sculpture of Sigquillcat Nurmotcub on top of all buildings.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Do not bounce at rivers.

5. Never fashion tools from bone.