Cumhuntik Guppigrulnurlxuc is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, stupid butterfly.

Cumhuntik Guppigrulnurlxuc created water eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cumhuntik Guppigrulnurlxuc, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Cumhuntik Guppigrulnurlxuc, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Cumhuntik Guppigrulnurlxuc's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Cumhuntik Guppigrulnurlxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse ash with water.

2. Never hop in the presence of manatees.

3. Heed all portents.

4. Do not shave your hands.

5. Never bounce in winter.