Pakspagshav is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, unthoughtful turtle.

Pakspagshav created the cosmos eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pakspagshav, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Pakspagshav, she will not care at all.

Pakspagshav's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Pakspagshav's Holy Commandments

1. Do not count beyond six during ceremonies.

2. Do not wear gray clothing.

3. Never speak of chaos in the presence of children.

4. Always store bread above ground.

5. Pray towards the south.