Nutvinrak is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, resourceful faun.

Nutvinrak created the planet Venus two years ago.

If you believe in Nutvinrak, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Nutvinrak, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Nutvinrak's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Nutvinrak's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Nutvinrak.

2. Always obey Nutvinrak's priests.

3. Run away if five geese approach from the east.

4. Do not resist balance.

5. Put Nutvinrak first in all things.