Quartjonfas Dossartfun is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, fast otter.

Quartjonfas Dossartfun created carbon nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quartjonfas Dossartfun, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Quartjonfas Dossartfun, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Quartjonfas Dossartfun's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Quartjonfas Dossartfun's Holy Commandments

1. Never point your hands toward the north during prayer.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Never travel toward the west during autumn.

4. Never prepare wheat during spring.

5. Do not hurt horses.