Pakfligflag is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, resourceful monkey.

Pakfligflag created a photon two million years ago.

If you believe in Pakfligflag, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Pakfligflag, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Pakfligflag's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Pakfligflag's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Always make sure there are no shrews in a building before entering it.

5. Never feed lots of rice to badgers while wearing brown tights.