Gofnibflam Sugrawnan is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, prudent mink.

Gofnibflam Sugrawnan created a top quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Gofnibflam Sugrawnan, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Gofnibflam Sugrawnan, she will refuse to believe in you.

Gofnibflam Sugrawnan's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Gofnibflam Sugrawnan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not gather at towers at dawn.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Pray only in darkness.

4. Always obey Gofnibflam Sugrawnan's priests.

5. Never go into purple rooms.