Gepsomrill Sidpodstrag is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, all-powerful pig.

Gepsomrill Sidpodstrag created the cosmos two years ago.

If you believe in Gepsomrill Sidpodstrag, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Gepsomrill Sidpodstrag, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Gepsomrill Sidpodstrag's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Gepsomrill Sidpodstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not contemplate spacetime during the night.

2. Never talk about mites.

3. Do not shave your head.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Gepsomrill Sidpodstrag on top of all buildings.