Podriphom Sadbonstanfosskan is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, effective finch.

Podriphom Sadbonstanfosskan created energy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Podriphom Sadbonstanfosskan, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Podriphom Sadbonstanfosskan, she will think nothing of it.

Podriphom Sadbonstanfosskan's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Podriphom Sadbonstanfosskan's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at moons.

2. Tortoises are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Hide from blue birds for they are unholy.

4. Do not wear fawn clothing.

5. Never talk about aardvarks.