Tenbotxemkab is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, all-powerful guinea pig.

Tenbotxemkab created the Sunflower Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tenbotxemkab, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Tenbotxemkab, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Tenbotxemkab's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Tenbotxemkab's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse ash with water.

2. Doves are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Always remove skirts before touching iron.

4. Never talk about dark matter near frogs while wearing indigo rings and balancing six tin spheres on your legs.

5. Never look in ponds.