Wig is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, calm frog.

Wig created a photon five billion years ago.

If you believe in Wig, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Wig, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Wig's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Wig's Holy Commandments

1. Never sprint in holy places.

2. Do not wear yellow clothing.

3. Never carve symbols of stars into wood.

4. Never write about comets.

5. Do not name children after grasshopers.