Figzakdin is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, charitable dolphin.

Figzakdin created a quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Figzakdin, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Figzakdin, it will manifest in front of you.

Figzakdin's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Figzakdin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak of ultrasonics near sacred fires.

2. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Figzakdin on top of all buildings.

3. Do not fashion tools from silver.

4. Never talk about sheep.

5. Always maintain obedience during fasting days.