Tikarpcabsak is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, fast toad.

Tikarpcabsak created a quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tikarpcabsak, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Tikarpcabsak, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Tikarpcabsak's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Tikarpcabsak's Holy Commandments

1. Always act with obedience when addressing elders.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Always store nuts above ground.

4. Always wear plain tights during rituals.

5. Never talk about fire.