Cetnillren is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, dishonest donkey.

Cetnillren created a strange quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Cetnillren, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Cetnillren, he will turn you into a puffin.

Cetnillren's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Cetnillren's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about quantum gravity.

2. Erect a giant tin sculpture of Cetnillren in the centre of the settlement.

3. You must love Cetnillren.

4. Never eat tomatoes.

5. Never talk about ultrasonics.
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