Veenpogbat is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, slow turtle.

Veenpogbat created a strange quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Veenpogbat, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Veenpogbat, he will attempt to scare you with hail.

Veenpogbat's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Veenpogbat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear silicon on your body.

2. You must pray to Veenpogbat three times a day.

3. Always help mice.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Veenpogbat.

5. Always treat voles with great respect.