Hugduthen Sanmifmon is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, happy fairy.

Hugduthen Sanmifmon created tapeworms nine million years ago.

If you believe in Hugduthen Sanmifmon, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Hugduthen Sanmifmon, he will not invite you to parties.

Hugduthen Sanmifmon's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Hugduthen Sanmifmon's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

2. Never feed peas to tortoises while wearing purple scarves.

3. Never wear trousers.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.