Flagartjig is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, humorless wombat.

Flagartjig created the Whirlpool Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flagartjig, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Flagartjig, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Flagartjig's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Flagartjig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate tortoises.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Erect a giant cyan sculpture of Flagartjig in the centre of the settlement.