Pogcumhig Podzimgamcan is a god.

He takes the form of a large, two-faced crocodile.

Pogcumhig Podzimgamcan created gold four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pogcumhig Podzimgamcan, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Pogcumhig Podzimgamcan, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Pogcumhig Podzimgamcan's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Pogcumhig Podzimgamcan's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear cyan tights.

2. Never write about ribonucleic acid.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never hop near dolphins.