Fetrakaf is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, duplicitous lion.

Fetrakaf created an up quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Fetrakaf, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Fetrakaf, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Fetrakaf's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Fetrakaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of garlic to nematodes while wearing gray jumpers.

2. Do not trade with those who eat bananas.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not stand on grass.