Jigdinbed Hotyaknad is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, blissful otter.

Jigdinbed Hotyaknad created snails nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jigdinbed Hotyaknad, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Jigdinbed Hotyaknad, she will turn you into a frog.

Jigdinbed Hotyaknad's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Jigdinbed Hotyaknad's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention ants.

2. Never paint your arms magenta.

3. Always help hamsters.

4. Never write about dwarf planets.

5. Do not trade with those who eat gooseberries.