Dimgesskap is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, cheerful wolf.

Dimgesskap created humankind five billion years ago.

If you believe in Dimgesskap, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Dimgesskap, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Dimgesskap's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Dimgesskap's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Do not keep eight dogs in a large pit.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.