Cumnanpig is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, staggering mongoose.

Cumnanpig created the planet Saturn three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cumnanpig, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Cumnanpig, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Cumnanpig's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Cumnanpig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about turtles.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate otters.

5. Do not cook food in pots.