Higlaplidbestcarbom Bumtenzan is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, ruthless zebra.

Higlaplidbestcarbom Bumtenzan created dark matter seven million years ago.

If you believe in Higlaplidbestcarbom Bumtenzan, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Higlaplidbestcarbom Bumtenzan, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Higlaplidbestcarbom Bumtenzan's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Higlaplidbestcarbom Bumtenzan's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no grasshopers in a building before entering it.

2. Erect a giant purple sculpture of Higlaplidbestcarbom Bumtenzan in the centre of the settlement.

3. Worship no other gods but Higlaplidbestcarbom Bumtenzan.

4. Do not kill cats.

5. Never feed bread to voles while wearing gray coats.