Fomdanrig is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, contented bird.

Fomdanrig created the planet Saturn eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fomdanrig, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Fomdanrig, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Fomdanrig's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Fomdanrig's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat aubergines.

2. Never think about thermodynamics near aardvarks while wearing turquoise boots and balancing four copper spheres on your face.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Pray towards the west.