Zenbonktunflannellsigyiksat is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, stupid gerbil.

Zenbonktunflannellsigyiksat created oxygen four years ago.

If you believe in Zenbonktunflannellsigyiksat, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Zenbonktunflannellsigyiksat, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Zenbonktunflannellsigyiksat's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Zenbonktunflannellsigyiksat's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no swans in a room before entering it.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Never think about gravity near ducks while wearing indigo skirts and balancing three silver spheres on your neck.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Zenbonktunflannellsigyiksat.