Gomnutnullfumbunmat is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, overgenerous swallow.

Gomnutnullfumbunmat created the planet Mars twelve years ago.

If you believe in Gomnutnullfumbunmat, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Gomnutnullfumbunmat, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Gomnutnullfumbunmat's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Gomnutnullfumbunmat's Holy Commandments

1. Always help turtles in need.

2. Erect a giant copper sculpture of Gomnutnullfumbunmat in the centre of the settlement.

3. Do not wear fawn clothing.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Never think ill of sick otters.