Tonkduttom Hudbutwee is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, unthoughtful dragonfly.

Tonkduttom Hudbutwee created a quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Tonkduttom Hudbutwee, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Tonkduttom Hudbutwee, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Tonkduttom Hudbutwee's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Tonkduttom Hudbutwee's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate porpoises.

3. Never write about ribonucleic acid.

4. Never think ill of sick sharks.

5. Never feed lots of garlic to whales while wearing mauve dresses.