Loopsafbep is a god.

It takes the form of a large, annoying troll.

Loopsafbep created the Large Magellanic Cloud three million years ago.

If you believe in Loopsafbep, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Loopsafbep, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Loopsafbep's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Loopsafbep's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick snakes.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Loopsafbep.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Always look after injured otters.