Queegbunzanbittinnat Bissnartruttag is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, astonishing crab.

Queegbunzanbittinnat Bissnartruttag created the world eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Queegbunzanbittinnat Bissnartruttag, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Queegbunzanbittinnat Bissnartruttag, it will be mildly annoyed.

Queegbunzanbittinnat Bissnartruttag's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Queegbunzanbittinnat Bissnartruttag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Do not trade with those who eat oranges.

3. Never talk about porpoises.

4. Put Queegbunzanbittinnat Bissnartruttag first in all things.

5. Never pour water over plants.