Talpigkemmum is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, ill-tempered goat.

Talpigkemmum created the Sol system four years ago.

If you believe in Talpigkemmum, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Talpigkemmum, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Talpigkemmum's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Talpigkemmum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about grapes.

2. Never skip in holy places.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.