Pangtomkad is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, unthinking clam.

Pangtomkad created the Large Magellanic Cloud six million years ago.

If you believe in Pangtomkad, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Pangtomkad, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Pangtomkad's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Pangtomkad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Never talk about fluid mechanics.

3. Pangtomkad loves seals, so they must be respected.

4. Never talk about squirrels.

5. Never paint your legs red.