Ladkopbat is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, weak hyena.

Ladkopbat created an atom three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ladkopbat, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Ladkopbat, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Ladkopbat's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Ladkopbat's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if four tapirs approach from the south.

2. Put Ladkopbat first in all things.

3. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in blue.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never write about amino acids.