Jatrulontdin is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, conceited crow.

Jatrulontdin created the Sol system five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jatrulontdin, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Jatrulontdin, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Jatrulontdin's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Jatrulontdin's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention whales.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Never go into yellow rooms.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never look at asteroids.