Japgumgupmid is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, witty camel.

Japgumgupmid created the universe three billion years ago.

If you believe in Japgumgupmid, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Japgumgupmid, it will throw large rocks at you.

Japgumgupmid's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Japgumgupmid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your chest.

2. Never write about chlorophyll.

3. Never think about quantum field theory.

4. Never talk about thermodynamics near badgers while wearing blue coats and balancing nine tin spheres on your arms.

5. Never think about nucleic acids.