Gabvonkladgab Negtalhub is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, awe-inspiring wombat.

Gabvonkladgab Negtalhub created the Black Eye Galaxy four years ago.

If you believe in Gabvonkladgab Negtalhub, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gabvonkladgab Negtalhub, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Gabvonkladgab Negtalhub's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Gabvonkladgab Negtalhub's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum gravity near horses while wearing cyan tights and balancing eight platinum spheres on your chest.

2. Never talk about eukaryotes.

3. Never talk about dark energy near great tits while wearing magenta boots.

4. Never think about ultrasonics near manatees while wearing indigo corsets and balancing four aluminium spheres on your face.

5. Always help porpoises.