Daphotlarp Somdadflis is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, happy elephant.

Daphotlarp Somdadflis created light two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Daphotlarp Somdadflis, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Daphotlarp Somdadflis, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Daphotlarp Somdadflis' most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Daphotlarp Somdadflis' Holy Commandments

1. Never eat pineapples.

2. Never paint your legs blue.

3. Draw representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Always pray immersed in water.