Wittarwanvencimfom is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, annoying hyena.

Wittarwanvencimfom created a quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Wittarwanvencimfom, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Wittarwanvencimfom, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Wittarwanvencimfom's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Wittarwanvencimfom's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Wittarwanvencimfom's priests.

2. Do not shave your legs.

3. Do not speak about lentils.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. You must pray to Wittarwanvencimfom five times a day.